Family of Warriors

Family of Warriors

Friday, 15 March 2013

The Pain is Still There

I really shouldn't be writing a blog.  I should be wrapping presents for my son Stephen.  He is turning eight tomorrow. Yet, I am pondering my day. 

It started like any other day except I had a pep in my step.  I was getting things done this morning.  Then I ventured out of my home to go and purchase birthday gifts for my sweet son.  I went to a clothing store to pick up an outfit and that is when it all began.

A lady was in the store picking up two onsies.  One was for a little boy that said, "I love Mommy."  The other onsie was for a little girl that said, "I love Daddy."  She began to talk how she was having twins with her boyfriend.  The babies are due in October. 


I became angry immediately.  I was frustrated that God gave someone else twins who wasn't even married.  My heart broke at my selfishness. 

I repented. 

Then I began to ask God what should I want for her.  How can I love someone who has something that I also had--once?

I remembered what God's Word said about your enemies.  Now, the lady was not my enemy.  I don't even know her name.  However, praying for someone makes your heart change. I needed a changed heart and attitude. So, I began to pray for the girl and her pregnancy.  I prayed that she would seek God and have a salvation experience.  I prayed for healthy babies.

I prayed that my heart would truly heal.  I begged God to redeem my situation and pain.

Just a few moments later--as I walked out of the mall, I saw another set of twins (boy/girl).  They were probably around 15 months old.  I smiled and said a prayer for them too!

If that was not enough....

I took my boys to their sport's practice tonight.  As I set at the table and fed my children, a lady game into the building pushing a stroller with twin newborns.  They were boy and girl too! 

At this moment, I began to ask God if He was trying to tell me something. 

A little later in the evening I was talking to Kaleb about my experiences today and he asked if God was telling me something.  At that moment, I looked up and saw a shirt that said 'Faith.' 

A little background information...we planned to name our twins Faith and Josiah.  When we lost the twins, Mark didn't believe that the babies we lost were the twins God gave him in a vision.  So, we kept the names of Josiah and Faith for the future (if there is a future.)

So, when I saw the name Faith after Kaleb's question I believed that God is asking me to have faith and believe Him for a great miracle.

Here I wait...again. 

In the waiting--I will trust God.  I will believe God.  I will praise God.  I will seek God.
"Now Faith is being sure of what
we hope for and certain of what we do not see."
Hebrews 11:1

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